Unveiling of the *improved* sleep routine

Here is my first piece of advice...

If you have a working sleep routine, don't screw with it.  Don't take vacations.  Don't visit family.  Don't convert them out of the bed/crib they are in, to the grown up size version.  Don't allow anything to trample on your well oiled machine routine. 

How do I know this?  Well, I had a fabulous routine.  It wouldn't work for everyone, but it did work for us.  I was able to put J down to bed around 7:15 to 7:30 after a bath & exactly 3 books.  With me working, this was wonderful, as it gave me good one on one time with J, AND me time.  Me time, you know that time spent picking out clothes for the next day, getting my bags ready for my sneaking out in the dark.  And if I was really lucky, some time to watch TV or read.  Serious me time.

That said, I had 2 weeks of unused vacation time & few floating Holiday's to use before 2009 came to a close.  So what is a girl sick of the Midwest weather, who hasn't seen her parents in a few months, and has a FREE place to stay in sunny Marco to do?  Why book that plane ticket, of course.  (Sunny - hah, wasn't that joke on me?)

J spent an entire week out of his routine.  No bath right before bed, as we were generally doing those first thing, or right before going out to eat dinner.  Sleeping with mommy, instead of on his own, since we were on the sofa sleeper.  Coming back to his newly converted toddler bed, he really didn't want to go back to sleeping on his own - so I started to lay with him until he fell asleep.  Holiday's, well, over-stimulated is a given, but we tried to stay closer to his routine, so I can't shouldn't blame them.  Mostly, having mommy 24/7 for 2 and half weeks, made him very mommy focused.

Going back to work, back to routine, became an exercise in frustration & futility.  It was taking 2+ hours to get him to go to sleep at night, most of the time with me falling asleep before him.  He would sleep fitfully.  Waking at every creaking sound.  When he would sleep, Payton, annoyed she was not getting her time with me, would cry at the gate at his door.  Yes, this so delightfully would wake him up.  Thanks for asking. 

I was thisclose to calling it a day.  And the molar pain started in earnest. 

read:  Mommy is ready to give up.  Call Mercy!  My child has defeated me  Okay, so I did leave his room to say, I give up.  Or to have Mr. M say, Jacob you have totally defeated Mommy.  Only to have him get him to sleep in record time without all the muss or fuss.  I may or may not have even called Mr. M during these days in tears, at work, to tell him I was overwhelmed.  Smartly, he offered words of support & encouragement.

Then I spoke with a good friend who suggested I do the dreaded cry it out (CIO).  I was convinced I should try this.  Mr. M is the one who set me straight.  As good as it sounded on paper, I would execute it poorly.  I'm not sure if it my style as a mother, or my "Working Mom's Guilt", but I suck at letting Jacob cry going to sleep.  I don't mean the meltdown temper tantrums; I mean the hiccupping sobs that would ensue a CIO process.  Plus, there is the whole - J is no longer in his crib & how will we ensure his safety during the process factor too.

So taking on other advice she gave me, I changed other parts of our nighttime routine.  I've cut out TV time, with the exception of 30 mins of Barney.  He still gets a bath.  On my days off, I still try to read to him.  (Right now, he just is not into that)  But mostly, I just focus on him.  Even if I'm cooking, I talk & interact with him so he knows he is my first & foremost priority.  Then we play until around 6:15.  If I'm running late, we skip this & go straight into our bath routine.  He is out of the bath & dressed for bed by 6:45.  6:30 if I'm doing really well.  This puts us into bed on or before 7.  He's been going to sleep like a champ. 

As for staying asleep, well that depends on the swelling around his teeth.  But with a little gum nummer, a few mommy or daddy snuggles, and a glass of water, he generally is good again till morning...

That said... On Monday, Daddy asked I keep him up until after 8 when he got home from work.  He didn't plan on it being after 8, but traffic was a bear. 

So we watched 2 Barney episodes.  We jumped. 

We laughed.  We'd take snuggle with Mommy on the couch breaks.

We jumped so more.       

                                    

(Notice, Barney is jumping too!)

And finally, we spent all of 5 minutes saying "Hi" to Daddy before I shuffled him off to bed. 

Sleep.Sucked.Rocks.Big time.Seriously.

It took us 2 nights, including one where we just let him crash out with us so we could all sleep, because I was too sleep deprived to think clearly.

Last night, we went back to the routine, and he, I'm relieved happy to report... Was in bed by 7, asleep by 7:20, and slept blissfully all.night.long.  Ahh... Blessed Sleep.

.....Now.... If they only had books that taught me how to sleep train my dog, I might actually sleep beyond 3 AM.... 

Ahh... The dreams of mothers... So very different from those dreams during my single days, when all I wanted was the perfect happy family this.  And I don't believe I could be any happier than I am today.